Is it me?

I just recieved a magazine of photos from our Christmas party. I looked through it for a picture of me (I knew there'd be one as I was talking the photographer for a while). I couldn't find it - I had to look through again and then realised I'd been looking for my "old" face!

I'm still not used to this one, even though I see it every day somehow it doesn't feel like it belongs to me and I don't recognise it as me (unless it's in the mirror and I know it's me).

It's a very strange, disconnected kind of feeling - and it's even worse if it's my whole body and not just my face.

I wonder how long it will be before my head catches up.

Breaking the rules

How scared of that pancake do I look?

Love this photo, it seems to capture the moment.

Last night was the first time I broke a key one of my new diet rules - eating mindfully and slowly whilst sitting down. Normally, I don't eat on the run or stood up anyway, so it's not a hard one to keep - but pancakes are different. They have to be eaten hot from the pan, and you have to make them all in succession.

So the tradition in our house is to make a pancake and then eat it stood up in the kitchen whilst watching the next person make theirs. It makes for a very convivial evening, especially when things go wrong, but it does mean that you eat your pancake stood up (can't wait to get a table in the kitchen, then perhaps we could sit during the watching bit!).

Although having said that, I'm sure someone once told me that food doesn't count if you eat it stood up *myth alert*

Pancake Day

Pancake day is always celebrated in our house - although we don't always manage to get the date right! This year though, we did manage to do pancakes on the right day - this is me tossing a pancake for dessert.

At 85 calories each (with lemon and sweetener) I limited myself to 2, and skipped having any carbs with my dinner (which was just chicken and veg). So I still came in below my limit for the day, whilst still partaking in this great tradition.

Pandamonium

Just watching the program that was on last week about pandas (my favourite animal) and thought I'd share this old photo with you too!

This is in Chengdu panda sanctuary in China, back in 2002. The moral here is not to wear a white T shirt when having your photo taken with a panda - they're not really black and white at all, but a dirty creamy-grey. This panda loves apples, and was kept happy with this apple while I stroked him behind the ears.

It's just a shame my backpack wasn't bigger, or the two pandas in Edinburgh wouldn't be the only ones in the UK!

Old picture

I've just borrowed David's phone to download the picture of me from last night's caberet event and found this!

According to the date stamp, this is August 2010. To be honest, I didn't recognise me! Can't believe the size of my chest - it's no wonder I always got food down the front of my clothes!

Rubbish Week

This week has been rubbish - a real mix of highs and lows. On Monday I had a colleague up from London, so went out for dinner (Albert's Shed - how did you guess?). It was lovely, as ever. Reasonably on target too, since I had salad for lunch.

Then Tuesday I woke up with a banging migraine. So a day spent between bed and the sofa, with not much to eat other than a sandwich or toast. Wednesday I felt a bit better, so went to work, but felt just as bad by lunchtime so had to come home again. Thursday was a repeat of Tuesday. It's surprising how I fall back on straightforward carbs when I don't feel well. Partly because a sandwich is so comforting, but also because it's convenient and easy when you don't feel like cooking.

Started to perk up on Friday, and was out for dinner on Friday night. Cafe Rouge this time, and have to say I completely went off plan. A small salad for starters, but then steak and chips and a sundae. Totally naughty, but just what I felt like - which I suppose is OK as long as it's not too often.

On Saturday we had a family get together - it's big sister's big birthday next week, so a family lunch was the order of the day. This time though I did manage to stay close to plan - although I did have a few drinks. It was a lovely day, and I really enjoyed it. Then it was off out, to the Lowry for a caberet night - fabulous!

However, the scales are showing that the week was not good - so some work to do now to get back below target. Hey ho - that's what happens when you take your eye off the ball.

above and beyond

I got weighed this morning and I'm about 4 lb over my target weight - a combination of a week of feeling poorly and miserable (and relying mainly on carbs for food) and then a couple of days of very social activities - too much good food!

So, it's back to a lower calorie limit for a few days until I'm back below 12 st 4 - 1200 calories a day for 4 to 5 days should do it.

So as a start, tonight's dinner was a veggie chilli - weiging in at just 212 calories - that should get me back on track!

Life is a caberet

So here I am at the caberet night, dressed up to the nines in black velvet and diamante. Feel very glamorous!

The show was great - a huge mixtures of acts including singing, dancing, acrobatics, burlesque and other skills. The seats in the stalls had all been replaced with large tables, so it felt very much like an old fashioned dinner caberet. Great fun - I'd recommend it if you see one locally. This one was compered by David O'Donnel, who is just masterful (and plays the eukelele wonderfully!).

Main event

And this was my main course. I went for a vegetarian option - aubergine and goat's cheese stack, with beetroot coulis and crispy leeks. It was served with brocolli and green beans - and I added some red cabbage too.

It was quite a lot of cheese, but goat's cheese is quite low in fat compared to hard cheese, so it wasn't too bad - and it was very tasty!

Lovely low cal starter

This is the starter I had - circles of melon with little cubes of apple and mango, and topped with ginger jam. It was really refreshing and tasty. I estimated it was about 100 calories - great idea to make at home for a change, and could be a dessert or a starter!

My mum and me

This is my mum and me at my sister's birthday lunch - so many people say we look alike, but we can't really see it - think we both have the same cheeks though - and the same eyes!

Feeling rough

Feeling rough today - still have a bit of migraine hanging over me, and still feel nauseous. Didn't really feel like having a salad - craving comfort food - so opted for soup and a sandwich instead.

Ham and egg with a bit of light mayo instead of butter. Doesn't look like much, but that's about 450 calories right there.

With the cake I had later and pasta and sauce for dinner, I overstepped the calorie count by nearly 200 cals today.

Rabbit rabbit

I also found a rabbit in the freezer, so made a rabbit casserole for dinner. Felt like I'd had enough carbs today with a sausage butty for breakfast, so had mine on a bed of cabbage instead of with potatoes.

Thought the rabbit was a bit tough, but it was tasty and the cabbage was lovely with the sauce from the casserole through it. Mmmmm

Pie

I also emptied the freezer of lots of blackcurrants and summer fruit - frozen during the summer glut of produce from my mum's garden. Since there was also pastry, it was definitely time to make pie.

Shame I'd packed up all my baking trays and things, but my good neighbour lent me some dishes (in return for a pie!) and using the old fashioned method of rolling out pastry using a wine bottle, I make 3 deep fruit pies. One for each neighbour on either side, and one for us - good job I found a low calorie aubergine curry (Alizone recipe) for lunch, because this pie looks lovely...

Losing a trusted friend

Today I said a fond farewell to my freezer.

We're building an extension on the kitchen, and our house is very upside down - and some of the appliances have just had to go. The freezer was first of the list, so for the last 2 or 3 weeks we've been trying to empty it, by eating the contents instead of shopping. It's not been too bad - plenty of low calorie curries and soup in there, and hardly any fattening stuff (that all ceased about a year ago!).

But I did have some chicken livers - so I made some chicken liver pate (which I'd planned to make over Christmas but never got round to it). I've made four small pots which will keep in the fridge for a bit - although I've already given one to my neighbour, as I don't want to live on it all week. I do know it's my husband's favourite though, so I suspect he'll be having it on sandwiches for his lunch.

Weight

07/02/2012 - 12 st
12 st - sorry, just had to repeat that!

Went for my 2nd monthly check up to make sure I'm maintaining, and I'd actually lost 2lbs, and I'm now 4 lbs under target. This is one happy bunny!

Looks like keeping a VERY close eye on my calorie intake and weight is working - I've been reasonably successful and keeping to 1,500 cals per day - a bit of variation, but on a weekly average it's pretty well there. And I log everything, I mean everything, even the things I don't want to admit too, like the sneaked chocolate biscuit in the office - but then if it fits into my calorie allowance and I'm still maintaining, then an occasional chocolate biscuit is OK.

Picnic

Today's lunch - a desk picnic, which is very common. Today, it's a salad, homemade mackerel pate, and some bread.

I'm saving my apple for my afternoon snack. In our staff restaurant you get a free piece of fruit with a healthy option lunch (soup, salad or whatever the healthy option for the day is) so I've usually always got an apple or banana to keep me going.

There's usually homemade bread too, which I love, but try and only have it when I'm not having any carbs for tea. Tonight I'm having steak and ratatouille, so I treated myself to this crusty end of the loaf.

Mmmm, lovely way to spend 450 calories!

Coffee Morning

It might not seem like much, but this is my first cup of coffee in 11 months!

I stopped drinking coffee when I started the Alizonne plan in mid-April, because I couldn't have milk and don't like black coffee. To be honest, I didn't miss it. But this morning my hubby suggested coffee for a change, and I really enjoyed it.

Not sure I'd go back to drinking it regularly, and certainly not after dinner (I've gotten to love my peppermint tea after dinner), but it was nice and did make a change.